She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
