literally had 100 drinks last night.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
