We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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