I hate your face
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
