i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
should my penis look like a turkey
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Randomize
