I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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