apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
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