it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
