Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
home. puking in laundry basket.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
