so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
We left the knife in your bed.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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