people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
