Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
