I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
