i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize