i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Randomize