At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
where are you?
Hypothermia
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Randomize
