Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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