Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
