i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
