i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
