and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
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