Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
