Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Randomize
