Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
