It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
