Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Randomize