I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
