I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
