next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Randomize
