i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Randomize
