hotel room ftw
So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
My dick has a subreddit
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
