There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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