worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
