i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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