HIV tests are more positive than that guy
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
