you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
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