You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
