no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize