My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
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