I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
