She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
