yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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