I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Welp...herpes.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Randomize
