We're facebook friends in real life
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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