it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize
