Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Randomize
