We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
