Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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