If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
