let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
